Dear Route 6,
First of all, welcome to my blog. I am really honest here.
This is your thank you letter.
Most of you don’t know this, but I came to EFY as a basically broken person. The last year has been the absolute hardest tme of my life. I had somehow become totally hopeless for my own future and totally lacking any kind of confidence in my ability to make good things happen. I was just waiting for my life to be over.
I really dragged my feet a lot in applying for EFY. I almost talked myself out of it several times. I was really fearful of being with other counselors, believe it or not. Other EFY counselors were always so confident and smart and loved and able…everything that I felt I wasn’t. I was worried that (1) I wouldn’t be liked and (2) I would constantly be reminded of how much of a failure I was compared to everyone else.
But Ry Chollet told me he would hold my hand (which, by the way, never actually happened, I’m sorta dissappointed) and that it would be okay. I’m really happy that I listened to him and finally accepted my contracts after having put it off for weeks.
From the very first day I felt so much love from all of you (mostly in regards to your kind comments on my Nerd Ropes earrings.) Josh really opened up to me on the bus by telling me all about Chris’ weaknesses. Bonnee let me sleep in her room after having just met me a few hours earlier, even though I could have been a weirdo.
When I was sick during the second week in Flagstaff, Russ C. acted so concerned. And it wasn’t even like a “I’m a BC, so here’s your token ‘we care about you, let us know what we can do'”, it was like a “I’m a human being who cares about other human beings and I am eager to help because I don’t want you to suffer.” It meant SO much to me.
One night Alyssa bought me Doritos just because I felt like eating Doritos. Devin let me use his laundry card…which I still actually have. Lauren let me use her scissors. Taylor gave me tape. Courtney gave me pills. Clint took me to run errands. Dalton had a sing-a-long with me. Abby told me I was pretty!
I had more fun in the past few weeks then I’ve had in a very, very long time. Cliff jumping, beaching, starfish holding, K-Marting, templeing, sleeping through movies. I felt like I had some of the most meaningful convesations of my life during free-time duty, sitting on curbs, in laundry rooms, and while riding a “fun bus”.
My cos this summer need a massive shout out. Clint, Courtney, Scott, Jayke, Ashley, Andy, Caitlyn, and Devin- you are all so wonderful! You are wonderful for what you do with the kiddos, and also wonderful for being able to work with me! I learned so much from your great examples. I’m sorry for my shortcomings…I’m still learning.
To the team- you guys did a great job. I wish I had more weeks with you.
I had some really deep, special experiences with a few of you. You know who you are. Thank you for teaching me about God.
I was sad to drive away last Saturday, but I was happy to be sad. You see, it has been a long time since I had anything to be sad about saying goodbye to. It is wonderful to have something to miss.
Thank you for the confidence you had in me and for the kindness you showed me. Thank you for being patient, forgiving, and always giving me the benefit of the doubt. I feel a lot less afraid of the rest of my life now. I have no idea what is going to happen next (like, really, none), but I have the hope that there has to be something good. There has to be, right? I know that God has wonderful things in store for you and am trying so hard to believe that the same is true for me.
Thank you for everything…I sorta feel like you saved my life.
Love you all,