Depressed on a Wednesday Night

I’m 26. I have a college degree, a blog, a yoga habit, a belief in Jesus Christ, and a garden.

Tonight I took a shower for the first time since Sunday morning.  No, I wasn’t sick.  No, I wasn’t camping,  And, yes, I did go to work.  I went to work without showering for three days.  This afternoon though I was actually dirty from working in my garden so I was able to muster up enough reason to actually bathe.  

 I got out of the shower two hours ago.  I’m still sitting in my bedroom, only part way to being dressed.  I’ve spent most of my time in my bedroom over the last few days when I haven’t been at work.  Sleeping a lot.  Actually, I just barely heard my roommate tell my neighbor that all I do all day is sleep.  Told ya.

I’ve managed to cancel my plans over the last four evenings.  A fireside, a pro baseball game (I had already bought) the ticket, the Mesa Temple Easter Pageant, and institute (I kind of have a standing appointment to go with friends each Wednesday night).

i was just asked if it normally lasts this long when I get depressed.  Sometimes it’s just a few hours, sometimes a day, sometimes a few days.  And sometimes, I had to admit, it lasts months.

I’m hungry, but I only have junk food.  I don’t want to go out alone, but I don’t have anyone to go out with.

This is what it’s like to be depressed on a Wednesday night.



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2 thoughts on “Depressed on a Wednesday Night

  1. katem0nster says:

    One of the most important sentences I ever read was two words long: Depression lies. Depression wants you to believe all sorts of terrible things that aren’t true. You are a wonderful blogger, and if you can take the time, I want you to read from The Bloggess. She writes about incredibly funny things and is sometimes inappropriate, but I’ve also never found someone who is more *real* when it comes to depression. Here are three of many wonderful entries she has written. Read her whole blog. It will make you laugh and cry and want her book (which you should get because it will make you laugh till it hurts.)

    You are never alone. I’m a Facebook message away if you want to talk.

  2. Revival Girl says:

    Depression is a scary place where dwelling inside makes it easier to stay. It is full of the things that come from hate. It prevents growth, smothers and whispers that it’s the best place to be. But sometimes out of love for ourselves we just have to let ourselves feel down for a few days.

    At the same time, the responder above me is right. It does lie!

    Keep working in that garden and getting some sunshine, go for a walk with your roommate, and when that recording in your head starts spinning round and round, tell it: who is loved by their Heavenly Father. I am! Who has friends who love me, I do!

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